Less than a month

As class wind down, papers abound, and finals approach I find myself more and more just thinking about India. I have been looking forward to May for so long, but now that the end is in sight I feel like it is entirely too soon. It's been a year of big changes for me, my first year of going to college and being away from my family has been difficult. I was hesitant at first to go to India because I was certain I would not be able to handle being away from my family for that long. However, with reassurance from my parents and buddies from field studies, I decided to go ahead. I am so glad that I did. I was devastated to hear that the field studies program is being eliminated. I am so grateful I was able to participate their last year. It is an amazing program. The loss will be sorely felt.

I prepare for yet another huge change, but this time more prepared. I may be in a foreign country that speaks a language I can barely understand, but I have learned so much from Venkat. I may not be able to speak to my family very often, but I can always pray to my Heavenly Father. I will not have many people I know, but I am so grateful for our great little India group. I am nervous to go, but I know I am prepared and will face my challenges with optimism and faith.

Learning

Last semester I was blessed to have classes whose subjects really blended well together. I was excited about my classes every week. While I was very busy and had plenty of readings, my classes had reasonable amount of papers and few tests. This allowed me to learn without stress. I spent a large portion of my time reading for my classes, and the rest just thinking. It seemed the teachers collaborated to form the perfect complimenting lectures. My classes: development, economics, political science, humanities all melded together.  I loved it.

This semester has been entirely different. I have many papers due every week, quizzes and tests abound, and an impending field study. While I am so thrilled to be able to study in India this summer, it is a source of anxiety for me. I feel so unprepared to be researching alone. I hate little time to contemplate these worries and fears with all my homework. It seems no matter how hard I work, there aren't enough hours in the day to finish it all.

I realized that I need a change in attitude. I cannot complete my responsibilities with a constant mantra of negative self talk. Even if I don't feel this way, I can tell myself I am excited to be able to learn so much. I can always make time for the scriptures. I can do my best and leave the rest to the Lord.

This summer will be similar in some ways. I will not ever really reach the point where the task is done. There will always be more I can research, more to observe, more to learn. I need to accept that and make reasonable goals. I can work as hard as I can, but I do not need to feel anxiety about time I don't have or things outside of my control. On the other hand, it will be different. I will not be juggling half a dozen classes. My sole focus will be on India and my research. This will allow me time to think and grow. I will be busy, but I will direct my time and learning. Who knows, I may miss having a never-ending "To Do" list over the quagmires of self directed research.

Random Reflection- Photography and Blogging

First off, if you are stressed as I am just meander on over to this website and feast your ears. You feel better already don't you?

I love photos. Unfortunately I have no talent with a camera. I have tried improving on my photography skills, but I really don't enjoy it. So I have decided instead to bring some sketchbooks with me. That way I can take field notes, write my personal thoughts, and sketch. As I have prepared for my this summer I found the most beautiful photography blog by Steve McCurry. He travels the world (concentrated in Asia) and takes lovely photos. He writes very little, but has some beautiful quotes up. I especially enjoy the India photography. Here are some of my favorites.

(all India)

 In all the hullabaloo of my days, the essays, reading, classes, blog posts, I forget how lucky I am to be able to study in India. Looking at these beautiful pictures has reminded me to appreciate the beautiful moments of my days. I will relish learning. I will even try to enjoy blogging. Plan to enjoy blogging. Be positive and tell myself I like it. Comment on my classmates' blogs. Everyone likes to be appreciated. Make it pretty. Be sincere.

Currently, my favorite blog is The Sartorialist. It's simple. He travels and takes photographs of normal people around the world. It's just crazy street fashion. A few years back, he went to New Delhi. Here are some of the photos. I really cannot contain my giddiness about Indian fashion. I cannot wait to buy some beautiful saris. Of course New Delhi is very different from Coimbatore, but I am delighted all the same.

 I know this isn't a real blog post Margaret; I'll write a responsible, academic one soon.